Members of a popular Internet forum were stunned after a woman explained how her brother’s vacation resulted in an unwanted encounter with a former lover.
In a viral post on Reddit published on r / AmITheA ** hole, Redditor u / bluebird249 (otherwise referred to as the original poster, or OP) said she was spending time alone in her parents’ second home when her brother arrived. unannounced with a group of friends, including her ex-boyfriend.
titled “[Am I the a**hole] for locking my brother and his friends out of our vacation home? ”the post received nearly 6,000 votes and 600 comments in the last day.
Writing that her engagement had been canceled two months ago, the original poster said she had retired to the vacation home simply to escape, but was recently disturbed when the group of men arrived unannounced.
“My brother and his friends, including my ex boyfriend, showed up unexpectedly a few days ago,” wrote OP. “I told them to leave, but my brother apologized because it was late and they had nowhere to go, so I accepted that they could stay for one night.”
“They all took him as a [green light] to enjoy the trip of the guys they had planned, “added OP.
The original poster said he had asked his brother and friends to leave the house numerous times, but was largely ignored before a fragile compromise was put in place.
“I asked my brother to leave multiple times, but he didn’t listen to me and his only compromise was that they wouldn’t come to the office area, which is where I spend most of my time,” OP wrote.
“I was angry and upset, and the anger kept growing,” OP continued. “In the end, when everyone left the house, I decided to close the doors from the inside so that they could not go back in, not even with the key.”
“When they kept knocking, I ignored them and my brother’s phone calls,” OP added. “When I finally replied to my brother, he was furious and we fought a lot because I wouldn’t agree to let them come back.”
While the occasional interaction with an ex is embarrassing enough, being subject to constant contact due to a sibling’s relationship with them is a completely different game.
While common sense dictates that keeping an ex’s family member as a close ally could pose obvious problems, namely their loyalty to your ex, some experts argue that close friendships are rare and should be valued, regardless of how close they are. to a failed relationship.
“The time you invest in your partner and their personal lives and relationships can seem difficult to let go of once things have started to crumble,” said relationship experts. Insider. “That doesn’t mean, however, that you have to let go of the relationship you’ve built with your ex partner’s family and friends.”
Unfortunately for many, bonds with an ex’s family or friends are easily poisoned by the remnants of the relationship that made those friendships possible in the first place.
In a 2020 article published by Anchorage Daily Newstandem advice columnists Wayne and Wanda turned to a woman who said she wanted to remain close friends with her ex-boyfriend’s sister and offered opposite advice.
Wanda made it simple, telling the woman that any relationship with an ex’s brother will be lopsided due to family ties. Wayne disagreed and advised the woman to keep her friendship with her ex’s sister, but only on one condition.
“I support you and even encourage you to keep this if you can do it in one indestructible condition: it never involves or revolves around the ex / brother,” Wayne wrote. “No taunting of him and whoever has been snuggled up when you all cross paths.”
“No positioning each other to make him feel uncomfortable. No comparing notes on what he’s done when he’s not around,” he continued. “In fact, don’t talk about it or give it any energy. Period.”
In her viral post, u / bluebird249 said her time at the vacation home was meant to purge any energy devoted to the end of her engagement, but that her brother, and her friendship with her ex-boyfriend, made it impossible. .
Throughout the comment section of the viral post, Redditors backed the original poster for kicking the men out of her space and criticized her brother for taking her ex-boyfriend with him.
“Your brother took your ex boyfriend ?? What the fuck ??” exclaimed Redditor u / 1egdj5bm in the top comment of the post, which received nearly 10,000 votes. “Sure you are [not the a**hole]!!! All the others [is] the asshole “
“Even if your brother is the best friend[s] with your ex, he has to respect your boundaries that you don’t want to see either [be] close to your ex, “added Redditor u / omegavision1, receiving nearly 2,000 votes.” Huge disrespect on her part for bringing your ex. “
Redditor u / RosexKx, whose comment received more than 2,600 votes, offered a similar response.
“Your brother took your ex boyfriend to his boys’ party weekend at the family vacation home when you were standing there heartbroken ???” they questioned. “Was he always such an asshole?”
“Your brother has a right [a**hole] and a complete fuck for introducing yourself to your ex, “interjected Redditor u / PaganBlues672.